April 30, 2010

we interrupt

Cold toast. Half-drunk coffee. Halted and then forgotten tasks. I find that most of my day consists of interruptions. Trying to sit down to lunch only to clean up spilled milk, my taco salad getting cold and wilted. Before my next bite, Soren starts rubbing his eyes, babbling and yawning, so I change his diaper, take him up to bed.
Back at the table, I sit down and the cat decides he wants back inside and begins to scratch at the door. Another few bites, and he coughs up a hairball. I've lost my appetite.

This is not always a bad thing (it certainly keeps life interesting), though I find it hard to concentrate much anymore. I used to be really good at it (if one can be "good" at these things), focusing on breath meditation, washing dishes without thinking about anything but washing, finishing a craft project. I love this quote by Karen Maezen Miller, which is taped above my sink:
Your attention is what spiritualizes things. Attention to the meal you cook, the clothes you wash. Attention is love. And that's transformative.

I'd love to regain my sense of focus and mindfulness regarding my day-to-day life. Being awake to the world, when changing a diaper, folding a blanket, wiping sticky little fingers, is what I'm working towards, which is why I haven't been blogging much. It's so easy to get caught up in the distractions and interruptions of an online life, when so much is happening all around me.

Do you ever feel that your online life is taking away from your real one?
In this vein of thought, I decided to go pick some flowers outside, just to reconnect with something "real". I think of John Lennon singing "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans" but changing the lyrics to "life is happening while you're busy on the computer."

I don't want my life to pass by while I'm lost in cyberspace. Not trying to proselytize or make anyone feel bad here, just sharing the place I'm in at the moment. Blog life ebbs and flows for me, so I'm sure you'll be seeing more of my usual posts soon, like crafty things (I'm working on something) reviews and such (I do like reviewing things and giving stuff away!). Hoping you have a wonderful weekend...maybe off-line? :)

13 comments:

  1. Kathleen, you know that I am in the same boat as you. With our little ones so close in age, we often walk the same path. I struggle with the ebb and flow, I inwardly stamp my feet and want to get things done. But she is ultimately the boss...for now.

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  2. I am in the same boat. I think you boat is more balanced right now than mine.

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  3. Precisely why I'm not a consistent blogger often! Love the quote above your sink!

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  4. I like to say I get things done in "snippets." Much like this comment, I suppose! Ha!

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  5. Very well stated Katleen. I am not online much and I no longer have wee ones to care for. Take care of you and your family, Soren will grow so fast, mine are looking at colleges. :( I want that time back and I am so grateful blogs were not around then, well it would not have mattered, I simply would not have had the time.
    Do what you love, I have discovered the blog world is always here, but precious moments with loved ones are not.

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  6. I love that quote!!

    I agree with you. Little ones are only little for so long...would it make any sense to stay at home with children, and waste those precious times? No!! :)

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  7. I could have written this post... lol. I feel the exact same way and have been feeling that I spend too much online although I'm not getting enough stuff done that I need to online, either!

    I'm thinking that part of it is that summer is here and the lazy winter days are over. Oh, and the not being able to sit down and focus on anything anymore is just life with a toddler. :) It's wonderful and frustrating at the same time. I try to enjoy it all because I know it's going to pass by too quickly.

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  8. i hear ya sister! I took last week off because of some neck pain, but it was nice to be unplugged!!!

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  9. Fabulous quote. I've definitely been too scattered lately, not giving anything enough focus. Honestly I think springtime makes us anxious. There is so much to do, you can get outside, you feel like there's a sense of imminent possibility and you're just not grabbing it fast enough. Because you're not already overextended. sigh.

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  10. I know how this is and with two kids I have to be unselfish...some of the times :) lol

    And I'm stretched.

    So when I feel like online is taking too much. I let it all slide. My blog should not pressure me, it's just apart of my living for now. There was a point when it wasn't :)...and a point when it might not be again.

    I love that quote you have.

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  11. We are such kindred spirits. Love this post. Most of the weekends I unplug completely. The little people know when we aren't present. Thanks for this beautiful reminder,

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  12. Thank you for this post! I am definitely feeling the same way. I slowed down a lot and plan to continue to do so. I do not want life to slip by while I am blogging or planning, I truly want to enjoy the moment with my friends and family.

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I'm a good listener...comment away!

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