Cold toast. Half-drunk coffee. Halted and then forgotten tasks. I find that most of my day consists of interruptions. Trying to sit down to lunch only to clean up spilled milk, my taco salad getting cold and wilted. Before my next bite, Soren starts rubbing his eyes, babbling and yawning, so I change his diaper, take him up to bed.
Back at the table, I sit down and the cat decides he wants back inside and begins to scratch at the door. Another few bites, and he coughs up a hairball. I've lost my appetite.
This is not always a bad thing (it certainly keeps life interesting), though I find it hard to concentrate much anymore. I used to be really good at it (if one can be "good" at these things), focusing on breath meditation, washing dishes without thinking about anything but washing, finishing a craft project. I love this quote by Karen Maezen Miller, which is taped above my sink:
Your attention is what spiritualizes things. Attention to the meal you cook, the clothes you wash. Attention is love. And that's transformative.
I'd love to regain my sense of focus and mindfulness regarding my day-to-day life. Being awake to the world, when changing a diaper, folding a blanket, wiping sticky little fingers, is what I'm working towards, which is why I haven't been blogging much. It's so easy to get caught up in the distractions and interruptions of an online life, when so much is happening all around me.
Do you ever feel that your online life is taking away from your real one?
In this vein of thought, I decided to go pick some flowers outside, just to reconnect with something "real". I think of John Lennon singing "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans" but changing the lyrics to "life is happening while you're busy on the computer."
I don't want my life to pass by while I'm lost in cyberspace. Not trying to proselytize or make anyone feel bad here, just sharing the place I'm in at the moment. Blog life ebbs and flows for me, so I'm sure you'll be seeing more of my usual posts soon, like crafty things (I'm working on something) reviews and such (I do like reviewing things and giving stuff away!). Hoping you have a wonderful weekend...maybe off-line? :)